And suddenly, country music makes me cry.

It's been a while since I've written. Everything has been crazy, beautiful, amazing, stressful, and perfect. Six weeks and one day ago, my daughter was born.

On February 7, 2013 at 5:11 PM a beautiful little girl named JamieLynn Paige Beasley joined the world.
I went in early that morning to be induced. At 6 AM they started Pitocin and at 7 AM my doctor broke my water. We started out at 2 cm and progressed bit by bit all day - about 1 cm an hour. All of a sudden, things got crazy. The contractions started to hurt way worse. I didn't want an epidural, but I wasn't sure that I would be able to handle it much longer. I asked the nurse for another dose of Stadol, which I had had earlier in the morning. I thought I would have time for it to get out of my system before the baby was born. When she gave me the Stadol, she checked me and I was at 7 cm. Soon, the pain was so bad that it was making me nauseous. I called the nurse and asked her to give me some Phenergan in my IV to help with the nausea. At this point, we all thought it was still going to be a little while, so Mark went downstairs to get a snack. The nurse had to check me for the Phenergan as well, and I was still at 7 cm. Just a few minutes later, the pain was unbearable. I knew that if I wanted an epidural, I would have to have a bag of fluids through my IV first. I also knew that if the pain went on for a couple of more hours I was going to need the epidural, so I called the nurse to give me the fluids. She had to check me again, and this time we were shocked to discover that I was at 9 cm. As she hung my fluids and ran them into my IV, I called Mark to come back up from downstairs. The nurse headed out the door and told me that she was going to get the doctor and the nursery to be on standby. I was having another contraction, and when it finished I yelled after her that she needed to go ahead and bring them in, because I needed to push. It couldn't have been more than 10 or 15 minutes, but waiting for Mark to come back up and for the doctor and nurses to scrub in and get the room ready felt like the longest time of my life. When the doctor finally said I could push, it only took five minutes before she was born - all 7 pounds and 20 inches of her. I think it might have been three pushes. I literally went from 7 cm to looking at my daughter's face in 41 minutes. It would've been quicker than that if I hadn't had to wait on the doctor and nurses. I remember yelling that I couldn't do it and thinking that I couldn't do it and then she was here.

My doctor was amazing. We had wanted to delay cord clamping and do immediate skin to skin contact and he allowed us to do both of those things. I know that a lot of doctors are not as accommodating. I tried to breastfeed but we couldn't get the hang of it, so I decided we would try it later. As I laid in bed and my daughter was being weighed across the room, she stuck her little foot in the air and I started crying and said she had long feet like her Aunt Jamie.

Everything since that moment is kind of a blur. We've dealt with a lot since then, including my having high fevers on two occassions (up to 104), her being re-hospitalized with jaundice and all the follow-up appointments that came with that, her not gaining weight correctly and the decision that we would have to stop breastfeeding and formula feed, and all the appointments that came with that. Not to mention, the typical sleepless nights with a newborn and a mommy who is crazy with hormones and the stress of the past year and a half. We've also been dealing with the bullies that are bothering the big kids and trying to balance the new baby with the rest of the family and our social life. But mostly, we've just been enjoying our new little munchkin. Her jaundice is cleared up and at six weeks old she is weighing in at an amazing 9 pounds. I've also gotten the all-clear from my doctor - he says I probably had an infection, but it cleared itself up. The nursery is finally finished, or at least close enough that I can consider it finished. Baby girl is beginning to get into a routine, so Mommy is getting a little bit more sleep these days. She's already growing so quickly, and beginning to do things that I didn't expect this early. She can roll over from her side to her belly or back, she smiles all the time, and she loves to splash in the bathtub. Today she slept in her crib for a little while during her nap for the very first time. Country songs about baby girls make me cry, especially when I think about how fast she's going to grow up. She's so amazing that I already want another one, even though I think that makes me crazy. The older kids love her so much, and have been a really big help to me. I'm so happy to be settling into our amazing new life.